A couple of weeks ago I took my son swimming for the first time. I got everything he needed – a swim diaper, swim suit and wet bag – before coming to a frightening realization. I did not have a swim suit that fit.

Great. So not only do I have to shave my legs, but I have to venture out in public wearing a Frankenstein suit cobbled together from a maternity top and old suit bottoms. It did not match or fit well, but I just held the baby in front of me and no one even looked at my crazy outfit.

It became clear to me that it was time to go shopping again. I will be honest, I had mixed feelings about this. Though I was excited to finally get some new clothes from regular stores, it was also scary to leave the safety and flattering stretch of the the maternity section.

So, I decided to drag you along with me, dear reader. I have written down my thoughts as I navigate shopping for clothing for the first time post-baby:

Upon entering, I am relieved to notice that drapey fabrics seem to be in fashion. Awesome! Good timing on my part! Though I am feeling fine about my post-baby self, I am not ready to load up on anything form-fitting just yet. I grab a few boyfriend t-shirts and a tunic-type shirt. Okay, good start, now onto the pants.

Ooh! So many colours and choices! So many buttons and zippers! I didn’t miss these. I grab a low waisted pair, but this does not work out well. After several failed attempts to buy the jeans I used to, I realize that I need higher waisted pants in my life. Goodbye muffin tops, hello my old size!

I am also pleased to see that leggings are still going strong. These satisfy my craving for stretchy pants, so I buy some.

Also, what the hell are ankle pants? Like flood pants? I try a pair on. They are indeed above the ankle like a flood pant. Damn, now I have to shave my legs again. I buy a red pair because I can’t resist. I text a friend to ask about why these exist. Apparently they allow you to show off your shoes. Crap, now people will be looking at my shoes?? Uh oh. To the shoe section.

Yea! Flats seem to be back. I think people who wear heels to work obviously do not spend their days lifting tubas and cellos. Also ankle boots are awesome. Maybe I can avoid shaving my legs after all!

Okay, can’t avoid it any more. Time for bathing suits. I make the happy discovery that padding is now sewn into the boob part of the swimsuit. In my old suits, it slipped in a little hole on the side, and always bunched up at the wrong time. This alone is worth the trip.

I try on a few suits. It is not nearly as bad as I thought. Okay, so things are not quite the same as before the baby, but I can live with it. Not only that, but I find myself not actually caring about those stretch marks. I doubt anyone is really looking, because they are obviously checking out my nursing boobs, but if they are, I will just hold the baby in front of the stretch marks. Problem solved. I chose two suits – a black one and a blue patterned one.

Feeling rather pleased with myself, I carry my pile of clothing to the cash. I entered the store overwhelmed by the sheer volume of choices and lack of pregnant mannequins, and left with a pile of new clothes and a renewed sense of self. Who knew a few outfits could make such a difference?

Now to the pool!