Time to Go Shopping! In a Non-Maternity Store!!

A couple of weeks ago I took my son swimming for the first time. I got everything he needed – a swim diaper, swim suit and wet bag – before coming to a frightening realization. I did not have a swim suit that fit.

Great. So not only do I have to shave my legs, but I have to venture out in public wearing a Frankenstein suit cobbled together from a maternity top and old suit bottoms. It did not match or fit well, but I just held the baby in front of me and no one even looked at my crazy outfit.

It became clear to me that it was time to go shopping again. I will be honest, I had mixed feelings about this. Though I was excited to finally get some new clothes from regular stores, it was also scary to leave the safety and flattering stretch of the the maternity section.

So, I decided to drag you along with me, dear reader. I have written down my thoughts as I navigate shopping for clothing for the first time post-baby: Continue reading

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Get out, my darling parasite. (And other thoughts when your baby is VERY late.)

 

Our baby was 8 days late. This doesn’t seem like much now, but it was actually the longest week of my life.

You see, I spent my whole pregnancy with the due date circled on my calendar, and much like many first time moms, when it passed without a baby emerging from my uterus, I felt somehow cheated. What is the hold up?, I wondered. Why is he still in there?

I waited for nearly a year for this. I had the pregnancy from hell. (Which you can read about here, if you like. Let’s be honest, if your baby is late, you probably have the time.) I thought I had put in my time on this project. I grew a baby from scratch. I didn’t eat for 9 months. The further I got past the due date, the more irritated I became, but what else could I do? The baby obviously didn’t get the memo. Continue reading

Sick Babies are the Worst

This is true. On the scale of terrible to awesome, they are a solid terrible.

Okay, before you go saying things like: “Newbie mom, YOU’RE the worst. Even sick babies are cute,” go spend a week with a sick baby. In fact, my sick baby is available. Anyone interested?

No? Didn’t think so.

Here is why sick babies are the worst: Continue reading

Baby MB Learns to Clap

It has been a couple weeks since baby MB discovered the joy of clapping and of all his new skills this one is my favourite. What is cuter than spontaneous baby applause? Not much.

What makes it even cuter is that while he has mastered the physical motion, he has not quite figured out the social context of clapping. So he claps when he is happy, when he is sad or when he is confused. The kid just loves to clap. I like to think he is just a tiny optimist – making the best of whatever comes his way.

Here is a short sampling of all the things baby MB has applauded this week: Continue reading

We went out at night!!!

 

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Having a blast during a rare trip out at night.

Yes, you read that correctly. My husband and I went out at night for the first time since Baby MB was born. It took us nearly 7 months and two tries (one was foiled by a suspected case of cousin pinkeye), but we did it.

And I didn’t feel guilty at all.

No, for real. I really didn’t. (And I don’t feel guilty for not feeling guilty either, so ha!)

The past month or so has seen me slowly reach my breaking point due to a never-ending sinus/ear infection, baby illness, my work not respecting my maternity leave, changes in sleep schedules and various other small things building up. I started becoming this angry, grumpy person that I couldn’t stand. I did not want this person to parent my son.  Continue reading

How Having my Son gave me Permission to Make Friends Again

 

Originally published at Mommy Connections East Toronto on March 11, 2016.

I have a theory about adult friendships. Unlike when you are a child, I think there are only certain windows of time when it is socially acceptable to actively look for new friends without appearing desperate. I’m going to call these “friendship windows”.

Some friendship windows include attending college or university, starting a new job, and of course having a baby.

Living in a larger city means it is socially unacceptable to strike up conversations with strangers pretty much anywhere, let alone ask them to hang out with you. As a well-adjusted adult, you are supposed to have your own friends, and therefore be too busy to need any new friends.

Even when you do. Continue reading

A Letter to Mirror Baby from Baby MB

Dear Mirror Baby,

I just wanted to tell you how much fun it has been hanging out with you. I mean, I love my mom and the dog but sometimes its like they don’t understand me at all.

You, on the other hand, seem to know exactly how I communicate. In fact, it’s like you are feeling all my emotions right along with me! When I smile, you smile. When I cry, you cry. When I  bonk my head, you bonk yours too in sympathy. You understand that sitting is way harder than my parents make it look. It is so nice to feel such support for my feelings. Continue reading

Strollers and Sidewalk Right of Way (Move, you dick!!)

Hello,

If you are like me, you have run into many issues pushing your stroller through the streets of the city. Though strollers give the illusion of mobility, in they winter they are basically useless. It seems many fellow pedestrians are dicks need help in determining whether they should step aside for those of us with strollers, so I have created a chart to help them out: Continue reading